Today we will consider such concepts as " Modern Russian family. The role of family values and traditions in the upbringing of the child ".
Creating a family and its well-being
Creating a family is a very responsible and serious step for which a readiness for family life is necessary, an understanding of all the seriousness and burden of responsibility that lies with the spouses.
Married life includes not only mutual love and affection, but social and moral maturity, economic independence and stability, health and understanding of everything that is going to pass.
The level of moral consciousness of young people is one of the main conditions for the readiness to create a family. You can marry at the age of 18 and at the age of 16, or you can be 30 years old, but when you marry you need to understand not only the notion of "marriage" or "family", but everything that is deeply in that word.
The main motive that serves to create a family is love. But, as experience and observation shows, you can not manage with one love, there must be a sense of responsibility, independence, mutual assistance, readiness for the birth and upbringing of children.
In the welfare of the family, the ability of spouses to live together, conduct joint households, distribute labor and family budgets, understand the responsibilities of each of the spouses, and the ability to properly overcome everyday problems play a huge role. Based on this, there is a certain system of cooperation in the family.
Marriage presupposes certain requirements for the behavior and actions of spouses, which may to some extent restrict the vault, which results in resentment, reproaches, quarrels and in severe cases until the divorce.
To some extent, it is impossible to get along without family conflicts in the family, it's impossible to change the habits and character of spouses at one time or a day or even a month, this takes years and for a successful result patience and understanding are needed.
Speaking about creating a family, the union of two people of the opposite sex is the most important thing that I want to note is the upbringing of children. Proper upbringing, an organized and friendly family is a great merit for both parents, this is a great, and very laborious work that requires the participation of mom and dad, their mutual understanding and understanding of their children.
Parenting is impossible and can not be shifted to one of the parents, education should be with the participation of both and a clear understanding of what each parent should perform. At the time of marriage and the earlier appearance of children in the family, problems can arise not only in everyday life, but also in material ones. In this case, the spouses need to learn to understand that the child is not the cause, and it can not be considered guilty of all problems, it is necessary to find a solution together and not show the presence of problems in the child.
What is a family for a person?
First of all, every family is associated with the house, with the understanding that it is full of relatives and close people, where they always wait where you can find peace of mind and mutual understanding on the part of relatives. The family is that small, and in some cases quite and not small, society, in which there is room for each of its members, where there is always harmony.
Family and family values are two concepts that I can not exist without each other. Family values can not exist outside the family. And the family can not exist without the presence in it of the fundamental principles that will preserve its integrity and spiritual health.
Family traditions and customs are an indispensable attribute of family happiness and well-being.
Family traditions - this is the spiritual atmosphere of the house, which consists of: the daily routine, the way of life, customs, and habits of the inhabitants.
The formation of traditions must begin at the very beginning of the creation of the family, when the children have not yet appeared or are still small. Traditions should be simple, but not contrived.
The happier the traditions and the more interesting the knowledge of the world in the parents' family, the more joy the baby will have in later life.
As you, for example, the tradition of reading at night. Even if the baby is still too small and does not understand everything from what you read to him, even the sound of your voice will be useful to him.
The role of family traditions in the life of the kids
- They give an opportunity to look optimistically at life, because "every day is an
- Children are proud of their family;
- The kid feels stability, because the traditions will be fulfilled not because the
- is so necessary, but because it is so desirable to all family members, it is customary;
- Childhood memories that are passed on to the next generation;
- Tradition is always repeated, because it is a tradition.
Family traditions, which are
Traditions for every day
These are small actions that create a sense of unity in the family, the feeling that relatives are close and will always support each other. Now it is very difficult to introduce children and adolescents to spend time in the home circle, when there is Internet, computer, smartphone. Everyday activities of this category are designed to collect family members together for a brief moment, updating family ties on a daily basis.
"Secret Handshake". So long recognized each other members of communities, organizations or clans. A family handshake is more important than just a sign that you, for example, are "from the Petrovs family ".This is a tangible proof of the support and warmth of close people. Fold your fingers together, shake your hands three times, slam your palms together. Such a secret handshake will give confidence during a responsible step, when the closeness of parents is especially important - at a wedding ceremony, getting a diploma and even in difficult moments of life.
"We are eating together". In the family tradition of the Russian people it is customary to eat together: this is the custom of a large dinner table, special dishes for adults and children, and a family tureen, from which the mother pours a portion of her favorite dish.
It is not necessary to sit down every time at the same time, but one of the meals should be shared. Decide how it will be more convenient in your case? Better - it will be breakfast, lunch or dinner, a snack in the kitchen or a full meal in the living room.
Enter the rules: no mobile, TV, you may want to tab on some topics at the table.
Good habits are easy to fix, if they are performed by all without exception:
- wash hands before eating;
- neatly put on the table;
- take care of the table for the grandparents;
- observe the etiquette;
- to help my mother, clean the dishes.
Adults, of course, set an example for children, older ones - younger. Behind food usually tell good news, discuss plans for the future and share impressions about what happened during the day. Praise and gratitude to those who cooked delicious food, too, can become a mandatory lunch item.
"Family embrace". Psychologists advise parents to hug their children more often so that they grow calm and confident in their own abilities. As they grow older, especially in adolescence, children begin to feel the 's "calf tenderness " of a caring mother or sister, but if you turn embraces into a tradition, it will become another source of inner strength and support.
Instead of the usual caresses you can embrace and say something like "Once! Two! Three! We are together!". At first it sounds tense, but if from childhood it is taught to children to such manifestations of unity, it will be received with a bang and at an older age.
«Fairy Tale for the Night». Some traditions of family education are important for the development of the child's personality. Children whose parents spoiled their reading at night are more successful in their studies and better have friends at school than their peers lacking this wonderful tradition.
Choose fairy tales by age, sit on the bed to the baby and read it to him with a few pages every evening. Listening develops attention, calms the nervous system and infuses peace into children's hearts. The wonderful memories of a fairy tale for the night cause many adults to return to this custom when they create their families, so this is a truly effective way to create a bond of generations.
"Evening walk". Some families have the opportunity to walk quietly before going to bed, to throw out of their heads all the problems that have accumulated during the day, and prepare for a night's rest. This is a very healthy habit that can be brought up from childhood. Comfortable clothes and shoes, five minutes for training - and you already lead a leisurely conversation in the fresh air.
Weekly tradition of
The goal can be to spend together a little more time than usual to maintain a home atmosphere of love and warmth. Refuse to be tempted to arrange debriefing - the criticism and tone of the inspector are out of place here.
« Sunday breakfast ».What will make it special? Another, more elegant dishes, dishes, loved by your households and requiring more time for cooking, long-awaited news and important decisions that children are looking forward to. For example, at Sunday breakfast you can announce where the family will go to have a rest this year, which relatives will be taking in the house for the New Year and other, necessarily good news.
« Shopping trips ».Everyone knows that making purchases for a week is not easy, so mom can connect all the households to this process. This is both a help and an opportunity to take part in choosing the menu for the next week, and an excellent practice for children who need to gradually learn how to run a farm and calculate the budget. If the child has his own cash, help them choose a purchase, but do not press psychologically - a free choice is still behind him.
" Day Football". Or another sport. Children will find it easier to determine the choice of sports hobbies, if they have been involved with their parents on a regular basis since childhood. Waiting for a weekend and compulsory trip to the football field, a treadmill or a tennis court makes kids and teenagers focus on the family instead of questionable activities on the street in the gateway.
Simple sports suits, sneakers and equipment( ball, stopwatch, rackets, etc.) - this is all you need for a family event.
« Family photo album ».Make an effort to design and save pleasant moments of life: a photo on the first day of school;photo with relatives from other cities who came to visit;a group photo of the whole family, where each member has his own special place;photos from competitions, competitions, awards;old photos of the generation of grandfathers and grandmothers.
" Small Holidays ".Parties about the events that determine the future of one of the members of the family are very important. Arrange small holidays with a simple treat, be sure to collect all together, without excuses, when something wonderful happens: admission to the institute, appointment at work, winning the competition, passing exams, engagement and so on.
" Together Outside the House ".An excellent tradition can be family trips to their native places, joint observation of grandiose phenomena - eclipse or a stargazing. Local festivals, many families like to visit all the composition( parade, city or rural fair, folk festivities).Before you begin to translate ideas, read a few tips that will help you successfully create new family traditions: Walking along the list of ideas, do not be afraid that all of them should realize it. In this case quality is more important than quantity, and if you manage to get one tradition from each category, consider that you have achieved the goal;
Do not rush to drop some ideas on the pretext that is "stupid" or "it will not work." Some ideas that are not too attractive for adults, like children, make a discount on age and children's interests. Choose examples that you want to use, according to your preferences - family composition, living conditions, beliefs.
And remember: for some action to become a tradition, it must be repeated on a regular basis. It is very easy to forget about the decision taken because of stress at work or fatigue. Make every effort, then the tradition will grow stronger and will be able to support you for many years.
In every family there must necessarily be traditions that children will later transfer to adulthood and their families. A lullaby before a dream. .. a fairy tale for the night. .. the legendary "Family dinners at the weekend" - all this is of great importance for the formation of a real family. In addition, it is especially important for a child to whom it helps to feel itself as a significant part of the Family, to develop a sense of security and confidence, and also this warmth, it's values, it's invariable. It is also important that all this creates a cozy friendly atmosphere, stability and mutual understanding in the family.
Passing all the importance of family traditions and values, parents not only follow certain rules, but come into close contact with their children, it is very important when dealing with them, both for parents and for children.
It is very difficult to develop a family tradition when children have grown up and they have already formed an attitude towards the family. Not because they are not interested in traditions or they think differently, but because they have the thinking that in principle it is possible and without all these traditions and values to live in the modern world.
It's quite another thing when parents show the child the world in all its beauty, surround him with love and form a stable life position throughout life. Kids perceive the world the way their parents do. It depends on them what later the child will have to do with himself, others and life in general. For him, life can seem like an endless holiday or an interesting and fascinating journey, and can be presented as a frightening sortie to wild places or in the form of ungrateful hard work that awaits him right after graduation.
It should be noted that not all families have family traditions and holidays. And it's not about lack of time. Simply, these people have lost touch with each other, they do not know what to talk about with each other, it is a burden to often contemplate their native faces. All this indicates a functional violation of life at home. This house, like the family, has fragile and fragile binding threads.
School and family
School and family are two social institutions, on the interaction of which depends the effectiveness of the process of child upbringing. The new philosophy of interaction between family and school is based on the idea that parents are responsible for the upbringing of children, and schools are called upon to help, support, and become the center of spiritual development of the personality of each student.
Interaction between school and family is the interrelationship of teachers, students, parents in the process of their joint activities and communication.
Teacher's task is to help students and their parents in understanding and forming family values, organize their educational work so that the teacher and parents go in one direction in achieving one goal - the formation of a spiritually-moral personality.
A. S. Makarenko said that the most accessible way of communication between school and family is through students. The advantage of this method is not only in its efficiency, but also in the fact that the child, accepting the demands of the teacher, becomes their guide in the family. This partnership helps to bring together the links between the family and the school, students and parents.
School, pupils and parents become a single team. Undoubtedly, such work strengthens mutual understanding and trust between the family and the school. Skilfully organized and thoughtful work of teachers promotes effective mastering by younger schoolchildren of concepts and representations about family values, development of ability to see value in subjects.
Parental lecture halls of various subjects are constantly working, educational work is carried out through information corners, advice to parents, individual and thematic consultations, parental universities, conferences, trainings. Parents are attracted to the classroom hours.
Professional parents organize the work of various groups, sports sections, clubs, theatrical and music studios in the classrooms. These events are related to the professions of the parents themselves, the world of their interests and hobbies, with the enterprises on which they work. Parents participate in the work of the jury of extra-curricular activities in the classroom, in KVN, music competitions and creative days. It all depends on how classy the leader will be able to attract parents to cooperate in the classroom.
A bit about modern society
Speaking about family traditions, I would like to say a little about modern society. As we see, and shows a lot of observations, it is far from being ideal. The emergence of economic crises, the presence of aggression on the part of adults and children, suggests that the most important values of each person are lost: mutual respect, understanding, mutual assistance, support. Children who grow up in today's society cease to be good, this can not be the fault of parents, but simply the influence of the environment in which it is located, but the facts that are unchanged and they are visible to the naked eye.
To solve this problem it is impossible to speak in one word, and one person can not solve it, it is necessary to expand the information on how important and important is the existence of family values in the family, it is necessary to make more accessible information on how to correctly transmit and instill the child traditions, it is a great responsibility to lay down on the shoulders of psychologists who need to teach their parents how to do it right. When we say correctly, we do not mean that mom or dad, sitting separately, should simply retell that when they were so wound up. Parents should tell him together why and how they have a tradition, how important it is for them and the child to continue observance of these traditions.
Parents should not just tell, they should show that all traditions are respected and very important for its members. The mistake of many parents is that they simply stipulate the presence of any values, but do not show its presence and importance, and at this time the child remembers that there is some tradition, but its non-compliance is not in principle important, in principletime it becomes to him in principle is not needed and is not interesting and that's how it is lost and forgotten.
Parents have a key influence and importance in preserving seed values and traditions. In the process of transferring to their child, a certain upbringing process takes place, in which the child develops such features as responsibility, kindness, understanding, love for relatives, mutual assistance. You can still talk a lot about all the advantages that are inherent in the presence of traditions and values in the family, but most importantly, that in the process of their observance, the family becomes more cohesive and friendly, they do not have differentiations between you and mine, parents and the child becomethey become a family, the child gets what is important to him at any age is communication and attention to himself.
When a loved one is near and the loud laughter of children playing is heard - the heart is filled with tenderness, the world plays with all the colors of the rainbow and wants to live forever. I want to stop this moment, there is only one desire that all this last as long as possible. Is it impossible?
Nothing is impossible - you just need to learn how to take care of these and other wonderful moments. Take care of love and understanding. Appreciate the trust of close people, because this is the most important award they can give you for your attitude towards them. Do not hurt the feelings of relatives, because it is from you they never expect it, and therefore, they will be absolutely defenseless before the blow. Values of family life - this is actually all that we have.
Childhood is the most favorable time for the formation of family values. It is during this period that the person is most open to influences, and the views and impressions obtained in childhood are deep and conscious. Children and parents are becoming active participants in the implementation of the most important tasks aimed at reviving and strengthening the social institution of the family, family values and traditions as the foundation of the foundations of Russian society.
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